Saturday, March 07, 2009

Taste Test

A few months ago I participated in a beer-tasting at a friend's house. In spite of my general proximity to beer -- what with the carboys in the closet that hang out and ferment and sometimes spit up on my jacket -- you'd think I'd know a lot more about how it's supposed to taste and the proper terminology used to describe said taste. But the technical language -- the top notes and bottom notes, the acidity and astringency, and even the comparisons to other familiar substances like grass, flowers, and grains -- doesn't help fill in any of the blanks for me.

So I have developed my own language for talking about beer, one that I think is more evocative and also more fun, if somewhat less scientific. Below are my tasting notes from that night.

1. Dry, bitter. Pale ale? Like being stuck in a conversation with someone you don't want to talk to at a party.

2. Bright, edgy, toothy. Like biting your tongue in the same spot twice.

3. Vaguely sour, fruity, round. Like hanging out in your best friend's basement on a rainy Sunday afternoon.

4. Light, sweet, bubbly. Like wearing a sundress.

5. Light, plain, simple. Like someone you don't want your friends to meet.

6. Yuck. Bready, bunrt. Like wearing a coat that's too warm.

7. Bitter, full, real, honest. Like making a great point.

8. Gingerbread! Like a fake smile.

9. Strong, dark, syrupy. Like getting caught in a storm.

10. Soda-pop. Like wearing a skirt that flies from your hips out when you spin.

11. Strong, spicy, saucy. Like slapping someone across the face, playfully.

My notes indicate that #7 was my favorite...now, if only I could figure out which beer that corresponds to...

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